Loyalty Cards

This weekend, we splurged and took a shopping trip down to Fort Collins. Every place we went asked us if we had a special customer loyalty card, and if we wanted one. When did these become so prevalent? I don't need a special discount card from Barnes and Noble, especially one that costs money. I know that when I get one of these cards, you're saving millions in marketing research. And all you give me is 5% off a paperback? I refuse to participate in growing your bottom lines while you stock nothing in the speculative fiction selection that isn't associated with a movie or a television show. And yes, I will be rude to your customer service people until you get the point that I don't want your cards, don't need your cards and am TIRED of being asked for a card. I don't have room in my wallet for a card for every god damn store that I visit once every few months. And I sure as hell ain't going to pay for the priviledge!

What I want is a card I can hand to the cashier every time someone asks me if I have one of these cards. This card will say "SPECIAL MEMBER, OPT OUT CLUB" and will do absolutely nothing. Just like the real ones they are trying to push on me.